27 weeks, or, hello 3rd trimester!

Bye bye pleasant, sweet 2nd trimester. Hello race to D-day! This week marks the turning point to 3rd trimester, with two-week appointments, birthing classes, braxton hicks, and apparently a fairly regular backache, ow. The moment is a little bitter sweet, since the 2nd trimester fully lived up to its reputation as the most "comfortable" and "energized" stage in this adventure. Of course, I can't really complain too much about the 1st trimester since I was one of the lucky lucky few who had hardly an ounce of morning sickness.

But now I enter into that third and final phase, in which my energy is supposed to wane, my back and hips will probably feel more pressure, and who knows what else. Luckily, it'll all end soon enough--that creepy widget Mike added to our blog says we only have 92 days to go!

Speaking of backaches, this week's vegetable on babycenter.com makes it all the more clear to me why my own back is starting to revolt against my growing belly. A cauliflower head is an imposing visual!

Here's their update on the Short Stranger's progress:

This week, your baby weighs almost 2 pounds (like a head of cauliflower) and is about 14 1/2 inches long with his legs extended. He's sleeping and waking at regular intervals, opening and closing his eyes, and perhaps even sucking his fingers. With more brain tissue developing, your baby's brain is very active now. While his lungs are still immature, they would be capable of functioning — with a lot of medical help — if he were to be born now. Chalk up any tiny rhythmic movements you may be feeling to a case of baby hiccups, which may be common from now on. Each episode usually lasts only a few moments, and they don't bother her, so just relax and enjoy the tickle.

BTW, I think I felt those hiccups the other night at yoga. Very distracting!

Short Stranger photo shoots

I present to you some of pictures from the big 20 week photo shoot, when we found out the Short Stranger was a Mr., and a pic from a 14 week ultrasound. The Short Stranger was not in the mood for pictures at the 20-weeker, and I had to get up and walk around to get him to turn around for these shots.

The pumpkin baby in profile at 20 weeks:

Again, at 20 weeks, all aglow:

From top of his head, waving hi! at 20 weeks:

And all button nose at 14 weeks:

How many months along are you anyway?

Two questions I often get are the above one, and, "why do they track in weeks?"

In the world of a pregnant woman, each week is a momentous step that culminates in a 40 week adventure (give or take). Doctors track pregnancy along this time line because something new happens each week. This is especially true in the very beginning, when important hormonal levels can leap from day to day, as the fetus quickly develops into something that represents human form.

For example, in this ultrasound from 7.5 weeks, Short Stranger barely registers (though in the video we did get to see his heartbeat!). This is the moment when the technician looks at you and says, "he/she pretty much looks like a bean."

But two weeks later, at 9.5 weeks, he has a head and body! Pretty cool, right?
All very exciting, but for the rest of the world, a woman is pregnant not forty weeks, but NINE MONTHS, right?

So how to make the conversion from weeks to months? This is trickier than it might seem, since each month (save one) is comprised of a more than four weeks. Thanks to the fabulous internet, though, there are several websites with week-to-month conversions. According to these calculations, at week 26, I was 5.98 months along, or ...almost exactly 6 months prego.

Project Nursery

I wanted to post a pic of the nursery in its most blank state -- which was after Bryna's parents came and helped us a TON work on getting the room cleaned, old stuff out, and ready for new stuff. Here is it in its most elemental state.

It doesn't look like this now, though. We've got the crib moved in, the infamous Amy Coe combo changer assembled and in place, potential wall decals/decorations laying out along with color samples, and the new IKEA Billy Byom bookcase that I just assembled (with amazing ease, I must add. I always find IKEA furniture goes together like butter . . . call me crazy). We'll add some pics once we've got things somewhat finalized (probably quite some time from now).

Ultrasound images are scanned and ready to go up with a post from Mommy-to-be. We have 7 weeks, 14 weeks, and 20 weeks.

Also, Short Stranger (aka Pumpkin Baby) has been kicking me in the head a lot when I press my ear up to Bryna's belly to hear him slosh around. Usually after talking to him in whale (please tell me you know my reference to Finding Nemo), he begins to kick around and move like the jolly Pumpkin boy he is.

More posts to come . . . we promise (esp. of the expanding bump, and our first baby shower in Iowa).

26 Weeks

Our main accomplishment this week was the big dint we put in nesting. With the help of my parents we managed to, as Mike likes to put it, "check 23 things off the To Do List." These items ranged from the large an onerous to very small, but most importantly, we've moved all the guest room furniture out Short Stranger's room, hauled it to charities, and now have the nursery furniture in and installed. We could do nothing else and would at least have a place for the little guy. Despite the pain that it took to assemble the changing table we love the the sleek look and rich tones of our new crib set, and are now working up our design for the decor to match the ensemble. So no pictures yet! We still have much to do in the nesting arena.

As for the Short Stranger himself, he is now apparently the length of not just any cucumber, but an "english hothouse cucumber." Sometimes babycenter.com can be oddly specific about their consumable metaphors. He seems to be sloshing about all over the place, since sometimes I feel him up near my ribs, and other times way down near my groin. He's also managed kick Mike in the head on several ocassions (Mike likes to listen to my belly to hear him move).

Babycenter.com has this to say about his developments this week:

The network of nerves in your baby's ears is better developed and more sensitive than before. He may now be able to hear both your voice and your partner's as you chat with each other. He's inhaling and exhaling small amounts of amniotic fluid, which is essential for the development of his lungs. These so-called breathing movements are also good practice for when he's born and takes that first gulp of air. And he's continuing to put on baby fat. He now weighs about a pound and two-thirds and measures 14 inches (an English hothouse cucumber) from head to heel. If you're having a boy, his testicles are beginning to descend into his scrotum — a trip that will take about two to three days.

could the recession lead to a readjustment of gender roles?

... another valid question posed by a recent post on the NY Times City Room blog: "Who’s That With Baby at the Y? Why, It’s Daddy."

Seems that the recession could be increasing the parenting role of men, since males have had a higher percentage of lay-offs recently and since couples are trying to make their schedules as flexible as possible to share parenting responsibilities in order to prevent the need for child care (saving big time benjamins). Could the failed economic policies of the Bush presidency be leading to less gender segregated roles for parents? I think that was Dubya's master plan all along (sorry to get semi-political again -- I really try to refrain).

An Open Letter to Amy Coe

Dear Amy Coe,

I am writing to express my feelings when recently putting together one of your wonderful products for our nursery: the Walnut Stamford Combo Changer. What an exciting product, and what a nice box. However, I had an unexpectedly swear-filled experience when putting this item together. I have a renewed appreciation for IKEA and the utter clarity of their visual-only assembly instructions, especially in comparison to the 22-part (plus hardware) 15-step process involved in putting together this rather simple, sleek piece of furniture. I was almost forced to call the IKEA 1-800 assembly hotline, and just talk to someone in Sweden who could calm me down. And at moments when the directions were clear, the pieces provided to me were not shaped correctly so as to lead to the creation of a proper Combo Changer. I should have listened to Huge from Swampscott, Mass., before trying to do this as a first-timer. I think Bee from Chicago had learned that lesson, unlike me.

Have no fear, Amy, I did manage to prevail after much banging, beating, shoving, and standing on parts to make them fit. In the time-honored Murawski fashion, I got this d#mn thing made, and it looks great. But I now understand why your product lines have become discontinued and you're "rethinking" things before releasing any new products. Take your time, Amy . . . seriously. And send Anna at IKEA a query to see if they can offer some helpful advice. The next time we get sucked into your stylish design trap (which we probably will, esp. since you are like 1 of maybe 3 companies creating decent-looking products for babies under $1000), I hope that you will not present such a challenge to my patience and my ability to independently reshape wood veneer.

Your valued customer/consumer in this recession, and dad-to-be with plenty of swear words to build basically anything,

-Mike Murawski

25 weeks

There are some weeks when pregnancy just announces itself. This was one of those weeks. After more than a month without any aches or pains, of being duped into thinking this pregnancy thing's a breeze, I woke up on Monday with back pain and the suspicion that I could actually feel my stomach growing. Luckily, a couple of yoga sessions soothed the pain; as for the latter, I think I'm going to have to buy more maternity clothes soon. After all, he is starting to grow at a rate of almost 1/2 lb. per week.

Not only is the Short Stranger growing leaps and bounds, but he's been kicking up a storm too! Sometimes I can feel him in multiple places at once. And the other night when Mike decided to try to listen to my stomach, the little guy kicked him in the ear! Yes. Attitude already.

Apparently this week, he is the weight of a rutabaga--yet another vegetable that I hardly ever eat. This week babycenter.com tells us this:

Head to heels, your baby now measures about 13 1/2 inches. His weight — a pound and a half — isn't much more than an average rutabaga, but he's beginning to exchange his long, lean look for some baby fat. As he does, his wrinkled skin will begin to smooth out and he'll start to look more and more like a newborn. He's also growing more hair — and if you could see it, you'd now be able to discern its color and texture.

Speaking of hair, Mr. Stranger's hair color is one of the greater mysteries. While I was born a dark brunette, Mike came into this world with blonde hair. Yet there's also a chance the little guy will have either black or red hair. At least one member of each family was born a redhead, there are several on my side raven black hair. The only thing I can guess for sure is he probably won't have curly hair.

Deep Thoughts by MetroDad

One of the "daddy blogs" I tend to follow is MetroDad. Seems like a cool guy, and a pretty good father. And sometimes he gets serious as hell. He really does. His most recent post was a philosophical one, for sure, but he ended with some words that I think are worth repeating here:

"... Parenting changes things in ways that we can never imagine.

If I've learned anything, it's that the key to parenting is finding the nexus between making the ultimate sacrifice of always being there for your child while also allowing the time to be alone so you can better know yourself and work on your own personal development. Finding that middle ground is a constant challenge and both are necessary in order to not only happily raise a child but also in order to raise a happy child. I can't overemphasize how important both those things are.

Because let's face it. Raising a child requires constant attention and engagement. The stakes are high. It's not their job to realize that we sometimes need to take a break from the realities of everyday life. All of us, at different points in our life, need to take responsibility for understanding that it's important to take care of ourselves. It's better for us. It's better for our kids.

For some people, I imagine they can have a spa day or a round of golf to refresh and just be quiet. For others, maybe a couple hours is enough to recharge. If some parents can retain ownership of those hours (with no cell phones, no play dates, no running errands,) I applaud them. Whatever you need to do to calm your mind and settle your soul, hey...I get it, man. More power to you.

That's just not how it works for me.

So, in the meantime, I struggle with this selfish belief that life is somewhat of an individual journey yet, at the same time, I realize that being a parent means subsuming those thoughts for the benefit of one's child."

Thanks, MetroDad. Hang in there, man.

As always, it is important to limit consumption of the foods at the top of the pyramid

At our house this would include little tufts of cat hair.

Credit goes to Noel Weichbrodt on this one.

the nesting continues...

. . . especially if our child plans to live outside:

Finally, the 1904 wrought iron gates (claimed to be from the World's Fair) are installed and the garden beg is planted. Big project done.

Now onto the inside of the house, with lots of projects ahead of us. Bryna's parents are heading down this weekend to help work on the house and the nursery. One thing Bryna has been prepping for is finding fabric patterns that would work for curtains, pillows, etc. (first in the nursery, then elsewhere). Here's a sampling of patterns we liked (colors are a bit off, though).

Updates coming soon on the Nursery Project (the real nest).

deadbeat dad news beat: setting the bar pretty freakin' low

Here's perhaps one of the funniest (in a VERY bad, sad way) news stories I've seen recently about an extremely terrible father. This really takes the cake. Only in Florida . . .

Orlando Sentinel: "Deputies say dad asked fifth-grade son to help dump body."

Just can't get over this. Darwin award?

waning power of parental consumerism

Call me a Marxist, but one of the interests of mine as we enter parenthood is how much the capitalist/consumerist "powers that be" can have sweeping control over how much junk new parents can be pressured into buying -- unnecessary junk that costs a lot.
BUT THEY LOOK SO HAPPY??

While one could certainly argue that buying a ton of baby stuff these days is patriotic and helping America recover from its recession/depression (although Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity would totally disagree -- they don't want anyone to spend anything so that there is a greater likelihood for Obama to fail) . . . sorry bout that. Anyway, where was I. Oh yeah, while we could buy a bunch of newborn bling, I'm interested in how to break the consumerist cycle.

Turns out we might we arriving as new parents at the PERFECT TIME, as a recent NY Times article suggests (brought to my attention by our friend and hiking guru Becca). One silver lining on the cloud of the recession could be the rapid decrease in expectations that all new parents have the latest gadgets and high-end products. I mean, if you can now buy your car on eBay (GM that is), you should also be able to buy your stroller on eBay, as well, right? And maybe not the most recent stroller model with GPS satellite and special womb sounds emitted from the seat (I just made that up, but I challenge someone to find something like this that actually exists... I wouldn't be surprised if it does. It would probably be found here.)

On that note, check out No Wonder Our Kids Are So Messed Up: 20 Strange Baby Products.

I have placed an order at LeftBank Books for Pamela Paul's recent book "Parenting Inc.," which I also heard about from a story on NPR. Once I get started on reading this, I'll let y'all know if I learn any secrets to preventing baby gear, gadgets, and toys from filling every nook and cranny of our house.

24 Weeks

An exciting week indeed! Not only did it begin with a fabulous camping trip, but our friends Noel and Elissa brought new life into this world with Zeke, future friend of Short Stranger. But this week was important in other ways as well, because I had my 24 week appointment on Wednesday--the last of the 2nd trimester!

Needless to say, all went well at the Dr.'s office. The little guy is measuring just right for his age, though he seems to be developing an attitude. He gave the doc a kick when she was taking his heartbeat. The doc chuckled and said, "even I felt that one."

What makes this week especially important, though, is that the Short Stranger has reached the stage of "viability." Which basically means that if he decided to come out today, they'd try to save him because for the first time, there's a chance he'd survive. Momentous but terrifying at the same time! We've told him he needs to stay put until autumn.

The Short Stranger is now the length of a cob of corn, which happens to be what we're having for dinner (seriously). And he weighs a bit more than a pound. Just to give you some perspective on this, the shouldn't-be-famous Octo-Mom's smallest child weighed 1.5 pounds when it was born. Luckily, I'm not carrying 7 other peeps in there with the Short Stranger, so he should keep on growing just fine.

And here's the weekly babycenter.com post:

Your baby's growing steadily, having gained about 4 ounces since last week. That puts him at just over a pound. Since he's almost a foot long (picture an ear of corn), he cuts a pretty lean figure at this point, but his body is filling out proportionally and he'll soon start to plump up. His brain is also growing quickly now, and his taste buds are continuing to develop. His lungs are developing "branches" of the respiratory "tree" as well as cells that produce surfactant, a substance that will help his air sacs inflate once he hits the outside world. His skin is still thin and translucent, but that will start to change soon.


By the way, my uterus is apparently the size of a soccer ball.

CONGRATS to Noel and Elissa -- and, reality just got immeasurably closer...

Huge congratulations go out to Noel and Elissa, who just had their first newby enter the world . . . Ezekiel Shinkei Weichbrodt, or "Zeke" as I'm sure he will be affectionately called from hence forward (although I can totally hear Elissa using the full "Ezekiel" for some disciplinary actions not too far down the road).

Pics and updates at http://www.bean.weichbrodt.org

How amazing is this moment!?! It has certainly pushed our own life-changing moment much closer (not in time, but in our ability to make it all seem real). To really think that we'll be experiencing this indescribable life event in a few months . . . and that there will suddenly be a new little guy completely dependent on us, and part of our family . . . something we brought into this world, to be here when we're gone. I actually had the real thought today that Zeke and Short Stranger will soon come to know each other (and I let our little guy know, saying "hey, you're future buddy was born today -- you'll get to meet him this fall . . . and probably beat him in you're first baby race, right?").

Anywho, not to get all mushy, but just trying to capture some feelings in the moment. Just simply amazing.

sometimes, pregnant women just plain rock!

I mean, take for example, my wife Bryna. We went on a weekend camping at Shenandoah National Park this past weekend (for the 4th of July, you know, to celebrate patriotism and all), and she freakin' hiked more than 5 miles in the mountains . . . and being 23+ weeks pregnant. How awesome is that?!?! Sorry to gloat, but I'm very proud of her. Must be all the yoga or something. Hopefully, Mr. Short Stranger will enter this world just rearin' to get to the woods and do some camping (right?).

While on our camping trip, I also was able to play a little back-and-forth game with Short Stranger. I tapped a couple times on Bryna's bump, and he'd punch back . . . and we did this about 5-6 times in a row (he was probably thinking "hey man, cut that out"). Very cool, though.

While I'm thinking about camping and friends, I wanted to share our re-visit to the beloved Rose River Trail in Shenandoah. Such a great trail, lingering along the river with several nice spots to just sit and chill as the stream rushes by. We hiked there in 2006 during our last group trip to Shenandoah, and returned to get another group picture this time. While life's events have changed the group slightly (and will perhaps soon lead to fewer of us being able to make the trek), I thought it was worth making the historical comparison for memory's sake. Here goes:

One final lesson learned from camping that related to quality parenting (due to our friends Jen and Jeremy and their adorable daughter Zoe) -- MUST BUY LARGER TENT WITH MULTIPLE ROOMS!

And a picture in honor of our friend Becca . . . the only person I know who owns fire gloves and brings them camping (maybe because she works for the Nuclear Regulatory Commission, and knows more than we do about what catastrophic events are in store for us in the future -- just kidding : )

Whose got pride?

Mike and me at the St. Louis Gay Pride Parade on South Grand, at 22 weeks 2 days.
I promise there's a big bump under that flowing blouse.

23 Weeks

Welcome to 23 weeks--just four more to go in the second trimester. I'm a bit late on my weekly baby growth post, but only because I had a fabulous July 4th vacation away from electronic devices, going camping in Shenandoah National Park with friends (more on that in a future post).

The big news on the baby front is that we mark the beginning a growth spurt in which the Short Stranger's size will double in the next four weeks. No more weekly growth increments of only 1 oz. for this little guy. As for me--now that the heat wave has passed, I'm feeling quite round, but pretty good.

Don't be fooled by the picture above. The baby has not shrunk! Rather than measure in length this week, babycenter.com is using its food metaphors for weight. So apparently, Mr. Stranger weighs about the same as a large delicious mango. Here's what they have to say:

Turn on the radio and sway to the music. With his sense of movement well developed by now, your baby can feel you dance. And now that he's more than 11 inches long and weighs just over a pound (about as much as a large mango), you may be able to see him squirm underneath your clothes. Blood vessels in his lungs are developing to prepare for breathing, and the sounds that your baby's increasingly keen ears pick up are preparing her for entry into the outside world. Loud noises that become familiar now — such as your dog barking or the roar of the vacuum cleaner — probably won't faze him when he hears them outside the womb.

Note: I have not seen Short Stranger squirm, but have felt him move when our noisy cat Fred meows. So apparently our babe will instantly be familiar with my voice, Mike's, and Fred's.

Music to My Ears

I, for one, am happy that the Black Eyed Peas will be making a less regular appearance in my daily life (see Mike's post below). I much prefer Huck Finn and Harry Potter to Boom Boom Pow. That song was getting stuck in my head at night when I was trying to sleep!